Monday, March 04, 2019

This is about parental rights, not vaccines

This is a fight for parental choice and a recognition of who ultimately has a say in your child's care. This is NOT a debate on the benefits or drawbacks of vaccination. This is a war on religious freedom and parental rights, make no mistake. Kudos to Arizona.

Perhaps you have researched vaccines and found the argument against using aborted fetal cell line vaccines to be weak. That's your choice and I respect it. Truly. But please hear me out.

What if your friend's conscience decides differently? Can we honestly support a law that does not give a parent the right to object to vaccines that are derived this way? Do we honestly think that forcing a parent to inject a substance into their child's body that truly violates their religious beliefs is medical progress? Who has authority over a child's body? How is this religious freedom to not offer a religious exemption?

Who decides a "legitimate" moral conscientious objection when it comes to vaccines? What if your friend objects to vaccinating their child for an STD? Some Christians are comfortable with this and others are not. Can we recognize that our consciences vary in this, and that it is for the parent to seek out treatment, not for the State to mandate? Can we honor their choice and not mock it as a "lame excuse"?

Can we recognize that when we lose the choice to make that decision as parents, we have lost a right, even if we would choose the CDC-suggested path?

Perhaps as a society we have general comfort with mandatory vaccination for children. Why does mandatory vaccination for adults make us more squeamish? This is an honest question. If you are in favor of the former but not the latter, I would genuinely love your explanation to help understand.

Yes, children are more likely to harbor disease. But adults can carry and have these diseases too. If we honestly think our commitment to society is greater than our personal convictions and if we honestly say "the science is settled" and "vaccines are safe," then why do we pause at the idea of adult vaccination mandates, but not mandates for children? Adults have the right to privacy and autonomy in medical decisions. Yes. But who has the right to decide medical decisions for a child? The State? Not on my watch! We need a proper sphere of authority here.

When legislation comes up that restricts a parent's right to decide medical procedures and treatment for their child, every parent in America should see that as THEIR rights being threatened. This is not about vaccines. This is about parental rights and in some cases, about religious conviction. I support your right to vaccinate. But can you support my right to not inject substances derived from aborted fetal cells into my children, even if you land differently on that debate? Do you believe in my religious freedom? I believe in yours. 

Article quote: "Rep. Nancy Barto explains it perfectly when she states, “We are here to acknowledge vaccines have a place, but it’s every parent’s individual right to decide the vaccine’s place in the child’s life,” Barto told committee members."" 

I can get behind that.

Wednesday, February 27, 2019

2018-2019 School Year

This year we tried out a few new curriculum options, and rather than give fantastic fawning reviews based on a few-hours perusal of the material and 5 days of implementation, I thought I'd wait and see if I *really* liked our new curriculum before laying out exactly what we're doing this school year.

(Alternate story: I started and stopped my school year summary several times last summer and fall, and never completed it until now. You pick.)

So what are we up to? Well, I have a 5th grader, 3rd grader, Kindergartener, and trouble maker this year. Heidi, our 3yo, is basically all the strong will of Hans combined with all the mischief of Martin. It's a powerful combination. She is a delightful mess. We love her to pieces, and she makes homeschool a frenetic dance instead of a gentle flow. LOL. Since we usually school July through May-ish, we have three-fourths of our school year under our belt, as we near the end of February. This is really really nice, as we prepare to move from NC to MN sometime in March.

So what are we studying and how are we studying it? We have a lot of sameness in curriculum this year, and actually several new additions.

Math 

We still love Singapore books, and have ever since Hans and I started the kindergarten level back in 2013. That same set of kindergarten books was just completed by Martin. Pretty fun to see the years and levels fly by and still beloved. I. love. Singapore. It does a fabulous job developing number sense, comfort with word problems, and pre-algebraic skills. Gretchen is working on level 4B and Martin just VERY casually started level 1A. And I mean VERY casual. My kindergarten approach is very chill.

My original plan was to have Hans complete level 6 A and B both this year, before moving on to either Pre-Algebra or Algebra (sequencing advice on this is mixed), but after completing level 6A this fall, I really felt the whole time like the fabulous challenging word problems that we sifted through could have been done SO much easier if we'd just get started on Algebra concepts and equation solving, and finally I realized we could just move on.

Since he's young and since we chose to only complete level 6A, we're starting Pre-Algebra first, using the same book I used over 20 years ago! (An Addison-Wesley text) I perused several different options, and while *I* liked Art of Problem Solving best and practically drooled over the text I got to thumb through, I realized that was MY dream, and looking through Addison-Wesley, the text just looked like a *great* fit for Hans' learning style, and a great intro to Algebra topics, and it was obvious he had all the prerequisites to dive in, which we did directly after Christmas break.

English 

Hans and Gretchen are doing levels 5 and 3 in Shurley, respectively. We have been with Shurley since level 1, and I still love it (though interestingly, my tentative plan next year is to take a one-year detour from Shurley, but that's a whole other topic, perhaps to write on later). I think their way of teaching sentence parts and classifying sentences is just fun. My kids love it, I love it, and I think the concepts will "stick." Jingles make everything more fun!

Roundabout Shurley level 3 with Hans, though, I continued loving the grammar portion and started hating the writing portion (or, finally admitted I hated the writing portion). We have steadfastly ignored the writing portion for the last 2 years as I tried to decide what I did want to do for writing.

While we decided what TO do, we turned Shurley into something that works for us (grammar-only), which is the beauty of homeschooling. I don't consider writing composition to be super-important in the elementary years, so with minor writing assignments like composing letters to relatives, occasional fun poetry forms, etc., I was willing to wait it out as Hans matured and I decided what path I wanted to take.

This year, now in fifth grade, I felt like Hans was ready for some gentle intro to writing that was NOT Shurley, so we started Institute for Excellence in Writing. Honestly, I never ever considered before last spring that I'd end up doing IEW. I had never looked into it in detail, but had vaguely heard of it various times as a "really rigorous and difficult and structured" writing curriculum, and I really didn't want anything super-involved with writing at this age and stage, especially for Hans. But then I sat down with a lovely new friend, also a homeschool mom, whose oldest shares many personality similarities with Hans, and she started chatting with me and sharing what has worked for her, and she started explaining all the reasons IEW has worked well for her and it just all shouted "Hans."

What had NOT worked for Hans in Shurley was this strange fascination Shurley has with giving higher order topics to elementary students, that require levels of knowledge and understanding and thought process beyond their years. Like asking a 4th grader to explain "the ways computers have changed our lives." Now *I* could write a 3 or 5 paragraph essay on the topic in a heartbeat, but I lived through the 90's and remember life before a computer and life after a computer. My 4th grader had not. Computers always had been for him, and until he studies higher level science and modern history, this is not a meaningful topic for him.

Institute for Excellence in Writing is *very* aware of the stupidity of this sort of writing assignment. They DO teach great composition skills, how to take notes and summarize another person's essay in your own words, "dress-up" your own writing with more interesting words and phrasings, and the basics of story writing, etc. Hans now loves writing (and has made leaps and bounds in his abilities this year), and Gretchen, never wanting to be "left behind" by her older brother, has joined us for the IEW intro video series, and has really done well at it.

I further took to heart Andrew Pudewa's suggestion to parents to consider allowing a child to type compositions. This took some swallowing of pride and theory, as I'm really not a fan of children over-using the computer at an early age, but let. me. tell. you. This has been a wonderful way for my kids to focus on COMPOSING, not handwriting and cramping. I gave Hans and Gretchen the option last summer of learning to type, and told them if they did learn to type, they could type their compositions this school year, and what a motivation! Handwriting is super-important to me, so they do copywork several times a week in cursive, as well as do most of their spelling in cursive. But separating handwriting from composition has allowed both skills to blossom, especially for my oldest.

My plan for IEW is to use it for a few years to work on specific skills of composition, but not use all the books, all the grades. I want to expose my kids to different ways and styles of writing, and I think IEW is a great start. We will likely move onto other programs at some point, that are more humanities-specific, when we reach rhetoric level.

Spelling 

Hans is in Grade 5 level with Matt Whitling's Grammar of Spelling (Logos Press). After much time spent perusing reviews of various spelling curricula, I chose this for him in second grade, and we've been with it ever since. No frills, no drama, and it's worked well for Hans. What works, we stick with.

But honestly? I don't love it. I wouldn't repeat it. I don't "get" why it still is published. It's so vanilla, nothing worth writing home about. And so many of the lists are obviously specific to what Matt Whitling's classes are studying in science and history. Okay. Not horrible, but not great. But my son's spelling abilities have NOT suffered, and it's easily a no-drama subject for him.

But for Gretchen we've always used All About Spelling (just started level 5). I really do love this program. We just use the teacher manuals, not the magnet board, not the flash cards of various kinds, not the extra booklet supplements and charts, etc. Extra pieces are FAR too likely to be kidnapped by a curious toddler. Gretchen is a naturally good speller. If I have a child someday who needs more help with spelling, I might find the flashcards to be more helpful. And I really am hoping to own a tablet sometime soon, so I can purchase the tile app to use when Martin starts AAS in a year or so.

I do truly believe that not all children need a formal spelling curriculum, especially not for all of elementary, but I have seen with my own eyes my oldest children benefit greatly from using one. Hans went from a 1st grader insisting he couldn't spell ANY word and wanting help on spelling everything, to becoming a confident, blossoming speller in 2nd grade, when we started an actual curriculum. (And once his confidence picked up, his standardized annual scores on spelling have been off-the-charts.) Gretchen, also, really has wrapped around basic rules of spelling (AAS does such a great job at this!) and benefited from it. *I* have benefitted from AAS's clear explanations.

Foreign Language 

I cannot recommend SignItASL enough, if you're looking for a good program for American Sign Language. We have been so pleased with it, and also thankful to receive the first three units free, since we had a deaf/hh child under age 3. With Heidi now age 3, I can assure you that when new units are released, we will happily pay for them!

This is our first year having a few subjects for the kids that regularly utilize the computer (IEW DVD's, online ASL videos, and Latin DVD's), so Adrian set up a separate username on my computer with a whitelist of a few select websites the kids can access specifically for school. This has been such a huge help, and a great safe option. While I watch IEW and Latin with them, they do SignItASL themselves and also have a few regular websites (like 50states.com) that they periodically access for history, that I wanted them to use without me.

We also started Latin this school year, after delaying for 2 years while we got a bit of a handle on ASL first. We are using Classical Academic Press' Latin for Children series, and I'm enjoying it as much as I could enjoy Latin. Haha. Meaning, learning Latin is not my thing, but this is a very workable curriculum with plenty of options to help, and the kids have taken to it well. Hans and Gretchen are working together on Level A, and Martin listens in whenever he wants (he won't start Level A formally for another 3 years, ish).

Science 

I explained this year's science plans pretty clearly in this post, from a few months ago. It has been a fun year in science!

History 

And now for probably the biggest curriculum change for us this year.

This has been a transition year for history. We used Veritas for 4 years and while I did love certain aspects of it, like the timeline cards, I found that sometimes I loved their book recommendations, and sometimes they really fell flat. Being a planner, while I intended to finish out the 5-year cycle for Veritas, starting a year ago I started seriously looking into middle school+ humanities option, to see what we wanted to do after the last year of Veritas, 18 months in the future at the time.

Veritas elementary is workable, but honestly, their middle-high school Omnibus option left no warm fuzzies in my heart, after perusal. THE DENSITY. Their questionable choices for some Greek myths. Nope, gonna search elsewhere. I also disagree so strongly with one of the main Omnibus authors on so many topics of a various nature, that I felt I was going to be doing some SERIOUS proof-reading for that curriculum, before handing it off to my young middle schooler.

Plus, while I think knowing his own culture first can help a person move out into later studying other people's cultures (and therefore, I don't think it's necessarily bad to start elementary history with learning a American-European-based history first, as long as it's not a racist one), I do think it's ridiculous to make an entire 2nd-12th grade curriculum pretty much entirely centered on the progression of European and American culture. Start there? Sure, I can see that option. But finish there? Graduate high school without ever really studying Latin America, Africa (outside of Ancient Egypt), Asia, or Australia? Nope.

So I started looking.

Back when Hans was four years old and I was thinking ahead to elementary history options, one of the many history curriculums I looked at for a LONG time (but didn't purchase) was Tapestry of Grace. I loved the philosophy of the curriculum, the multi-age set-up (designed with many kids in mind), the progression through time periods, and cycling back at a higher level each time. I loved the extra options for the older grades, like philosophy and government based on primary resources.

But it just looked like potential overkill for early elementary and I also was really not a fan of many of their rhetoric level books at the time. (I was thinking long-term, as Tapestry is definitely a multi-year, investment kind of purchase.) If I knew we'd use it for long-term, yes. But not knowing how long it would "fit" us. I wasn't sure if it was a good choice for our first time through elementary history.

But. Since then my kids have grown. And Tapestry has also redesigned many of their rhetoric book choices, and all the reviews have agreed it's for the better. More primary sources, etc. I'm now really excited about rhetoric options, should we continue with Tapestry. And I absolutely love love all the wonderful book options they suggest for the upper and lower grammar stages (which we are currently using). So many gorgeous books, so many options. Primary and secondary history options, poetry options that match the period, literature options, church history options.

For the record, Tapestry is for K-12 and can be used from the start! Don't get me wrong. Many people do. In fact, their recently-released Tapestry Primer is a gentle K-1st (ish) intro to the Tapestry philosophy and cycle of history, and were I have to have youngers-only again, it would probably be what I'd pick. As it is, all my kids can naturally cycle onto Tapestry with what I have. So I'm NOT trying to say Tapestry isn't for younger kids, just that my initial thoughts, when my oldest would be entering elementary was whether it was right for us, THEN. Especially with the availability of Primer as an option, I'd say yes, it's a great option.

I feel like Tapestry fills a balance in the Christian curriculum world. It is a gentle, story-based curriculum in the younger years, that rises to a crescendo of deeper thinking and discussions and rhetoric in the later grades. But also? A lot of Christian curriculum is just. . . trite. It gives the "city on a hill" America view. Or to over-compensate for that, many secular or "modern woke" Christian curricula are more pagan in perspective than Christian. I really like Tapestry's focus on God's sovereignty in history, but willingness to talk about the good, bad, and ugly of God's people.

The biggest criticism I see against Tapestry, from reviews, is that people feel overwhelmed and feel like they can't "do it all." But Tapestry makes it clear that NO ONE should do it all. They offer many options to fit different levels, different emphases, different learning styles, different family goals.

While I have a toddler in the house, we will not be doing many hands-on projects. Sorry. No can-do. Those will be an occasional. I'm also just not a worksheet-y person. About once a month I give one of the kids a Tapestry worksheet option for either history or literature, or we do it together. I use one if I particularly find it helpful to pull out some ideas, but am not tied to the idea that worksheets somehow make learning "more measurable."

Tapestry allows us to read, and read a lot. And read from many options. I purchased most of the primary history suggestions for the upper and lower grammar this year, along with the poetry options, geography options, and the art appreciation book. I purchased most of the church history books, as our library had none. Most of the secondary history options and the literature options, I was able to get from the library or we already owned (Hans actually has read many of the dialectic literature options too), and a few I have purchased. If I see a book at the library that is on a similar topic or seems a good replacement to a recommendation, I often sub.

Some of the books are a great level to assign to Hans (especially) and Gretchen to read independently, some we read aloud together, and others Adrian reads to the kids or we listen to an audio version on car rides. So many different options, and it has worked well. Each week and unit I assess what we can realistically cover. I do not believe doing all the choices benefits anyone. But we have done many, because they really are fantastic choices.

I have been impressed with the beauty and quality of the vast majority of Tapestry of Grace's books. Lovely literature, showcasing so many different cultures and value systems in a respectful way, but all drawing it back to a solid Christian worldview. They have taken tough topics like slavery and the Trail of Tears, and dealt with them respectfully, but at a child's level. As we hit each topic, I'm also excited to look ahead and see the choices for the dialectic and rhetoric levels, though we aren't in those stages yet.

Bible and Catechism 

We read through the Bible as a family slowly, day by day in family devotions, and when we finish, we start again. Our church does the same in worship. These are the backbone of our Bible exposure, along with weekly worship and sermons on Sundays.

We have also been enjoying slowly making our way through the Read Scripture series on YouTube, which is a really well-done overview of each of the books of the Bible. And the kids and I are sporadically making our way through Leading Little Ones to God. We kind of oscillate in homeschooling between using devotionals like this, and focusing more on memorization.

For catechism, we currently use First Catechism, in review for Hans and Gretchen (who have completed) and incremental memory for Martin.  We are using CMI Bible memory cards that correspond well with the catechism questions. Hans and Gretchen have mainly focused on their Sunday school memory verses and longer passages in scripture in recent years (Isaiah 53 was their most recent project), but one of my goals in the next year or so is for them to finish out the CMI cycle of memory verse cards that correspond with the catechism. I memorized the exact same set as a child, and they are really a lovely base for Christian life and doctrine. We will continue to mix them in with occasional longer passages.

~~~

And that about wraps up our school curriculum summary! Just in time for people considering curriculum choices for next school year (February 'tis the season). How thoughtful of me to keep forgetting to finish this post for over 6 months. Ha! But just think what a better perspective you get, after I've used my curriculum for longer. :-)

What were your favorite curriculum choices this year? What will you be changing next year? What will you be adapting? A friend recently published a fantastic blog post with cautions and inspiration for these sorts of choices. Highly recommend!


Monday, February 04, 2019

Measles Quiz, and a Plea for Sane Discussion

I am merely copying this here for reference, not for discussion. I no longer regularly inhabit this blog, so don't want to field discussion here. This originally was posted to my private FB page (on which I only accept friend requests from known people), for discussion there. Hopefully even without discussion, it can still generate some thoughts. Thanks. <3 nbsp="" p="">
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"Between 1900 and 1963, death from measles declined by 98% in the U.S., due to advancements in living conditions, nutrition, and health care. This significant decline happened before the measles vaccine was introduced in 1963." 

Taking this quiz on measles, prepared by a group of physicians who merely want transparency and full information to the public, will cost nothing but 3 minutes of your time, and the chance to assess what you know about measles. What's to lose? 

Once again, I'm happy to engage in conversation, but only civil discussion that is on topic . I am greatly saddened by our culture's lack of ability to have civil discussions on vaccines, without name calling, red herring, straw man, and so many other basic logical fallacies. Laughing at the other side, making sweeping claims and assumptions - none of this adds to the discussion. 

There are doctors on both sides of this debate; there are parents on both sides of this debate. My family doctor (M.D.) does not administer the MMR vaccine, though he fully supports parents who choose to vaccinate, and helps them to find a place to do that. Where there is a risk, there should be a choice, which is why I fully support parents who do vaccinate and those who don't. I'm here to inform and challenge ideas, not judge parenting decisions.
To say that you choose to vaccinate is something I can respect, and I will not mock that. But saying that "the science is settled" does nothing to add to the discussion except confirm that you are not open to discussion or defense of your views, and possibly that you haven't actually done much reading on the CDC website, websites that house peer-reviewed medical journal articles, or sites like the Physicians for Informed Consent site that houses the measles quiz - nor have you listened to the millions of parents crying out that something is not right with this generation's children. 
For that matter, I question how widely-read and studied by the general populace the vaccine inserts are, that come with the vaccines themselves. Not the "cheat sheet" short version the doctor hands the parent, but the lengthy one that lists so much more info, like the human diploid cells (aka aborted fetal cells) that are in some vaccines, the cautions concerning pregnant women, miscarriage and the flu vaccine, the cautions about shedding of live virus vaccines and precautions necessary after vaccination, and all the other delightful tidbits that are written in extremely small font on ~30 pages of info, that most parents are never actually handed, but can be found for free on the FDA website.
I am not implying in any way, shape, or form that 
IF you spend hours on the CDC website and 
IF you read beaucoup articles on vaccines on medical journal sites and 
IF you listen to your "crazy anti-vax friends" and their sob stories about their chronically ill children and 
IF you read the vaccine inserts in full, 
That you will then become an "anti-vaxxer." I really don't even like that term, nor do I subscribe to it. Science requires interpretation of data, and different people react and interpret it differently, including scientists in white lab coats.
I do think it more likely that you will realize that scientists are fallible just like the rest of human beings, that there are arguments for and against vaccines that are held by intelligent people, including physicians, and that possibly, the science is not quite so settled in all areas, for all vaccines, as you originally thought. Possibly you will find the science convincing enough to continue to vaccinate yourself, or maybe you will rethink your own choices. But my prayer is that you will realize the diversity of info out there enough to respect those who disagree, and to work towards a continued conversation, instead of a shut-down of communication.
Peace in the name of the search for truth, folks. May we all find it. 

Thursday, November 01, 2018

Homeschool Kindergarten Goals


Kindergarten is optional.
Please repeat many times before proceeding.

Kindergarten can be a fun and useful foundation to future education. Please repeat many times before proceeding.

Okay, now that we've prefaced with that. . . 

I am not the world's expert on kindergarten. I'm kindergarten-ing my third child right now, but I'm not nearly the most experienced or wise person I know on the issue. And I know my children; I don't know yours.

But my goals are much broader than what my children have done and who they are as children and students, and I think many of these ideas don't just apply to my children, but could work for most children.

My children have finished phonics at different ages. They have adapted to the pencil grasp and basics like coloring in the lines at vastly different ages. They moved from kindergarten to 1st grade math at different times. But the principles below still apply to all three, and I think they will easily apply to my fourth child, because these goals are more about principles. The specifics are suggestion, to be tweaked as needed.

Another caveat: not all moms need to love all the same things. We are individuals with gifts, inclinations, and different passions. I happen to be a mom who REALLY loves the kindergarten age.

Since I am nothing if not verbose, I try to break up paragraphs and label sections clearly, to ease the eyes and allow you to read as desired, instead of get lost in a 10,000-word forest of my ramblings :-D.Sorry that I do nothing by halves :-P.

And for your benefit, here's the

Table of Contents
All the Prefaces
Table of Contents
Reading Philosophy
The Language Foundation
Specifics of Phonics
Handwriting Philosophy
Specifics of Handwriting
Math Philosophy
Specifics of Math
Science Philosophy
Specifics of Science
Spiritual Training, Habits, and Chores
Extras in the Kindergarten Years
Why Kindergarten Looks Different for a First Child (and why that's okay)
About Changing Your Plans
The Trickle-Down Effect
If You Have a Gifted Child
A Weird Way to End a Post on Kindergarten Goals

Reading Philosophy for Kindergarten

My number one academic goal for a child of kindergarten age is to light a fire of loving books. I did NOT say to love independently reading by mastering phonics, or even necessarily starting phonics in the kindergarten age. I said to love books. Those are different things. A child loving books and loving to read with others will take him far in life. Learning to read super-early has been proven over and over in many studies to take him absolutely nowhere extra, on average.

If a child is ready to read in kindergarten or before, go for it! Just make sure HE's ready to read, not that you're ready for him to read. ;-) Don't do it for bragging rights! One of the very best things for my relationship with my first child at age 4 was to teach him to read! But it doesn't mean every child will benefit from it, nor is that a general goal for all of my children.

So my reading philosophy for kindergarten and before is to love books together. Foster a love of books by reading together a LOT. This doesn't mean that you should feel guilty if your newborn is colicky and you can't sit for long periods and read, and read, and read with your kindergartener. But treasure it, protect that time, make room for it over worksheets or formal phonics. It will take a child far.

For my third child, Martin, he has been eager to be "big" and learn to read himself, so we do a bit of phonics 2-5 times a week, but I read to him a good deal more. I try to keep a constant influx of fun books in the house, to "light his fire" of reading love. These books include any that trusted friends recommend, random suggestions I see online, beloved family favorites, seasonal-specific options, options specific to his interests (ocean-anything is his major obsession!), and suggestions from a few blogs I follow.

I am a dedicated user of our online library catalog, for library reserves. I read education posts in one tab with my library catalog up in another tab, and I will reserve any and all suggestions that look remotely interesting. I will NOT browse through our library willy-nilly in person, especially with my dear children in tow, as it usually yields a pile of library books that are mostly drivel. :-P

Find blogs and forums you love and trust, to give you awesome ideas for read-alouds. I love Read-Aloud Revival for a great start on book ideas, but there are so many great additional options. I like to suggest people start at Read-Aloud Revival, because Sarah MacKenzie is so much more than booklists; she is all about the relationship that comes with reading with her kids. I also freely drown people in book recommendations, when asked. :-D Just make sure to put on a raincoat!

The Language Foundation 

The REASON reading is so important is because reading is one of the best ways to gather language, learn new language (not just foreign languages, but your own, as your vocabulary and usage increases), and to gain new knowledge. Reading truly is the key to academic education.

But in order for reading to be deeply beneficial, your child has to have a good grasp of language in the first place! In the next section I'll talk about the signs I looked for that my young kids were "phonics-ready," but a pre-skill they had before that was fluent language. That had to precede "phonics skills" like letter sound awareness.

The English language is about 85% phonetical. The remaining 15% of words aren't as straight forward - mainly sight words or more complex words that are partly phonetical, exceptions to general rules, etc. Learning to read is often and well-described as "decoding," because what a child really is doing when they learn to read is taking the language that is already in their brain and learning what it looks like on paper. For each of my children, it's been interesting to see that they really are pulling from their knowledge of their primary language as they decode words, and their guesses and revisions of what they're trying to read are referencing the English they already know. (This is also why I think asking a child to decode nonsense, nonexistent words as a phonics exercise is not a great idea, as a general practice!)

So, for a child who is delayed in language because of a communication disorder, autism, hearing loss or deafness, emotional trauma, or language deprivation, or any other reason, focusing on LANGUAGE well before any kind of phonics (even decoding 3-letter words) is so much more important.

My youngest child is deaf, and we have used a combination of sign and speech with her. She is rapidly catching up to her hearing peers with speech and language (via cochlear implants), but I don't anticipate that her English will be as ridiculously-advanced or complex at age 4 or 5 as my other children. I don't anticipate her being an early reader, but I anticipate her being a good reader after she has a solid language foundation and she's ready for phonics. This might be at age 5 or 6, but it might be later. I'm quite willing to focus on language through daily life and conversation, progressing in sign language myself, and through me reading TO her, even if that means she doesn't read early or "on-time." I refuse to press a skill (reading independently) that needs a base of fluent language, until I feel that base is fully in place. You don't start building a house until the foundation is solid!

Specifics of Phonics in Kindergarten
(and preschool and 1st grade+, as needed)

What I've done for each of my kids is to start by playing with letters. Sometime in the preschool years. These can be letter magnets, shapes, cards, tiles, whatever. With my oldest, we lived in an apartment complex with a ton of cars parked right outside our townhouse, so we studied license plates and pointed out letters and numbers a lot that way. As my kids become interested in the names of the letters, I foster that interest.

After they have the letters down, start mentioning that the letters make sounds. If they enjoy parroting back the sounds to you (in speech or song, in much the same way they might parrot back animal sounds), gently encourage that, but if they're uninterested, try again several weeks or months later. Don't overwhelm with too many new sounds or letters in a single, short sitting with them (preferably on the floor).

At that point, with each of my 3 older children, I left it at that until they started noticing on their own that the letter sounds they'd been taught appear at the beginning of spoken words. A conversation with a 4yo might happen like this:

Martin: "M-Martin. My name starts with the 'M' sound!"
Me: "That's right! Your name starts with an 'M'." (I might also write out his name to show him.)
A few days after, or later that day. . .
Martin (randomly, while listening to me read a book about bears): "B-bear. B! The bear starts with the "B" sound!"

This has been a reliable indicator with my oldest three that their sound awareness has taken root a bit, and that they were interested in the relationship between sounds and words. It happened with their initiative each time, though you could certainly point it out yourself. This is the point that I have started an actual phonics program for each.

It has NOT meant the same thing for each child, nor has it happened at the same age for each child.

For my oldest, it meant that he sped through phonics in 5 months at the age of 4 years, and he hasn't slowed down reading since. For my second it meant starting phonics SLOWLY at age 4 (after she'd begged me for months), and taking a full year to complete. She was eager, but needed more time than her brother, and I purposely didn't rush. For my third, it meant starting phonics slowly at age 5, after much begging and obvious initial interest in reading. It meant going very slowly the first few months, as his interest was greater than true natural inclination. And in the last month or two (he is almost 5 1/2), it's meant that suddenly, he's really getting this reading concept and doing fabulous, even though at our rate, I still think it will be a full year at least of slowly doing phonics before he's "done."

For some children it might mean waiting until age 6 to start phonics, or beyond, or it might mean a different and more specialized approach to reading, if they have additional educational concerns. Reading does not come easily to all people, but for many children, it's just a matter of time.

Having an independent reader is never one of my goals for kindergarten. But if it happens naturally, that's okay. In fact, it's really handy! I just don't expect or stress over it.

We have used Hooked on Phonics, and loved it. There are other good options out there. All About Reading is kind of hard to beat, from everything I've heard from friends, read in reviews. . . plus I've loved their spelling curriculum (to start later! - not in Kindy!)

Handwriting Philosophy for Kindergarten

It is okay if your child doesn't form letters well as a five-year-old. Yes, really.

I have a child who figured out the pencil grasp at 18 months and was forming nice letters (that she taught herself) at around age 3-4.

I also have a child who didn't color in the lines of pictures until age 7, and until this point found any small amount of handwriting to be absolute torture.

Boys often do NOT have fabulous fine-motor skills. I'm very afraid that our expectations of handwriting (and other fine-motor skills) for kindergarten are based on the average girl, not the average 5yo. (That's just my private opinion, which I just posted on Blogger.) Don't get me wrong: some boys DO have great fine-motor skills at age 5, and some girls do NOT. I get that there is a wide variance.

Handwriting is honestly one of two areas that I would definitely do differently, could I have a "re-do" with my first child. (The other area would be to focus more on self-control; I did focus on self-control a LOT, but not in the same way I would now, given a healthy dose of perspective, re-training of myself first, and an understanding of 2e children.)

Specifics of Handwriting in Kindergarten 

There are many ways to "play" with letter formation besides pencil and paper. Since realizing this, I haven't had a child who DIDN'T like pencil and paper, but if I had another child like my first, I would do things like salt tray writing, wikki sticks, etc. first. I would buy big pencils, or other alternate writing instruments like big crayons or triangle-shaped pencils.

I would relax more.

Even with my first, we didn't do a lot. A few times a week, he traced a line of letters (all the same - so maybe five "big A's"), and then I required him to try to form one of the same letter on his own. Now, honestly, I wouldn't require the independent formation, if he wasn't inclined. I don't see this as necessary for a 5yo anymore, but I would encourage interest and skill that did exist, and have for my other two.

Other great tools that are pre-handwriting, that I used with some or all of my kids: Mazes! These are fabulous fun for pencil control! Dot-to-dot! Coloring!

Once a child has good pencil control and has practiced the basics of each letter formation, I would suggest doing one of the following (and a child might be ready for this in kindergarten, or might be ready later or earlier):

(1) If a child is still learning to read, copy out 1-3 sentences from his phonics lesson onto primary ruled paper, and let him copy them below your copy. My third child is loving this!

(2) If your child has mastered phonics BEFORE getting past basic letter formation, then move on to a basic copywork or penmanship book. I love Rod and Staff penmanship, which I used for my first two children. (I used option (1) above for my third child, so we have not used Rod and Staff yet.)

Math Philosophy for Kindergarten

You do not need a math textbook in kindergarten.

BUT, I use one. So there.

I really really love Singapore Essential Math K (books A and B), which is not to be confused with their more involved "Early Bird" program for K. I use the texts as a springboard and as a general guide for topics to cover. They have fun pictures that illustrate the concepts.They are super low-key.

But I do not consider our text to be the "main thing." We don't even write in the workbooks! That's how much we use them as guides, not as exhaustive worksheets. Remember what I said about my oldest child not being "comfortable" with handwriting until age 7? Well, one thing I don't regret is allowing him to do the vast majority of his math until age 7ish (far beyond his kindergarten book!) orally or with manipulatives.

We use a lot of manipulatives in the kindergarten age. We learn numbers in the same way we learn letters, and we learn to write numbers in the same way we learn handwriting.

And we talk math. We talk about math in every day life, we count objects, we "take away" objects (which is far more fun than adding them, though we do that too). We skip count, or count forwards, or backwards while playing hide-and-seek. We measure things. We ask "how many more" of something we need to make 5 total, or 10 total. If I have 8 cookies, and my four children are splitting them evenly, how many does each child get? Take 10 blocks (tell your child how many you start with), and hide some of them under a bowl, then ask your child how many are under the bowl, given how many are still showing on the table.

Specifics of Math in Kindergarten

 Buy a set of Unifix cubes. Do it. We use them all. the. time. For kindergarten and far beyond. I also really like a good base-ten set, as it's easier when we get up past 100.

Use dice (all kinds!) to roll two numbers to add together. (Or subtract!) Buy a clock with gears, that you can use for years to come, as you learn time. A child doesn't need to start time in kindergarten, but understanding the hours is a good base, and you will use it for the future.

Find a basic kindergarten curriculum that isn't too involved, isn't too worksheet-y. Or if you're braver than me, don't! Find a basic list of kindergarten math facts, and fly with it! (There are children who love to do endless worksheets, and I've had one of them, but most children will NOT bloom with a really involved curriculum that requires 36 weeks of lessons for kindergarten.)

Then whatever curriculum you choose, use it as YOUR guide more than your child's guide. Your child honestly doesn't ever need to see the book. It's okay if he does. It's okay if he writes in it! But it is your tool, not your master. You can use it as a reference, to see that "okay, we could now work together on comparing groups of things, and discussing 'more' and 'less' in sets." "Ah, now that we've done adding and subtracting in 10's, we can expand that to doing the same, within 40." "Oh, skip counting is a kindergarten topic! We can do that next!

As you do things like adding and subtracting, make up stories with your kids. All my kids have loved this, but for my oldest, it was THE hook that made him fly through math.

Scenario: I hand him 5 brown unifix cubes and tell him he has 5 kittens. Then I show him 3 red unifix cubes and tell him I have 3 kittens. "If I give you my 3 kittens, how many do you have now?"

We repeated this over and over and over and over, altering the numbers, doing addition and subtraction, doubling with small numbers, etc. We also used poker chips, as those are another nice manipulative for this age. You do not need ALL THE MANIPULATIVES, but it's nice to have a few kinds, for variation.

Science Philosophy for Kindergarten

Go outside. A lot. Teach your child the glory of God's creation by admiring His handiwork.

Specifics of Science in Kindergarten

(All optional! Science is totally optional!)

If you want some really fun science books that introduce nature and science topics in a gentle and fun way to children, I have never read anything by Dianna Hutts Aston or Gail Gibbons that I haven't loved :-). They have written so many wonderful titles each! I also love the many, many insect books that Eric Carle has. The Berenstain Bears Big Book of Science and Nature is a fun and engaging volume of lots of science and nature topics. I don't particularly care for the way the father is portrayed, but when gently addressed, I feel it is still worth a read. :-) We wore out our first copy, and are now on our second now-tattered copy.

We actually read science books heavily in the kindergarten years, because we have very curious children when it comes to the natural world! We also do very few experiments because that's not Mommy's jam. (We do some, just not many!)

Spiritual Training, Habits, and Chore Goals

This is really the meat of the younger years! I probably should have put this first, for this very reason, but I am really trying to address academics in this post, more so than "everything else," and it seemed to fit better with all my "other topics" after the basic subjects that are actually academic. But I feel like these are so much more than "everything else."

If you work on discipling your small kindergartener, showing him grace and Christ, modeling worship for him day in and day out, and help him begin to hide God's Word in his heart, you have done more for him than if he has mastered phonics, loves to be read to (yes, even that!), and has started memorizing his multiplication tables.

The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, and the knowledge of the Holy One is understanding. Proverbs 9:10 

We do family devotions after supper most nights of the week, which consists of part or all of a chapter of the Bible (We read consecutively through the Bible, and when we finish, we start again!), with appropriate explanations, followed by a prayer or song. Short and sweet, but nourishes the soul over many days and weeks and years. We also catechize starting around age 4.

With all my school age children (not just kindergarten), I do a variety of spiritual training. Sometimes in school we are more consistent than other times. Sometimes we focus on scripture memory, then we might focus on a devotional book to read at the beginning of our school day. I love the scripture series memory cards that correspond to CMI's Bible and catechism Sunday school curriculum. And we have enjoyed the audio of The Jesus Storybook Bible numerous times. Right now we are reading through Leading Little Ones to God, which is a lovely devotional that is Biblically-sound and a good level for preschool up through all of elementary.

Habits of courtesy, manners, and cleanliness set a child up for life. This is NOT my strong point! It is what I strive for, but remembering the importance of focusing on these is not my natural bent! I have grown a lot in this area as a parent, and I have so far to go! Having neuro-typical children currently in the "little years" has made this a much easier thing, but the "easier now" has also come with a change in my focus, expectations, and attitude.

And chores! No, I don't think a 5yo needs to have a long list of chores to complete every day. But a 5yo can be helpful and can do it cheerfully. What small regular jobs around your home can you train your 5yo to do and do well? You would be surprised at how well this skill of doing a job cheerfully and thoroughly can transfer later into the classroom, not to mention all of life.

My 5yo is in charge of unloading the dishwasher, in helping with daily and weekly pick-ups of the house, and can help with some very basic kitchen things like peeling carrots and stirring oatmeal. He can bring library books or smaller bags of groceries in from errand trips. He puts away his laundry with a bit of help. He is one of my most enthusiastic dusters (when we actually get around to it!). Just a few small things that are well within his abilities and are good both to train him to be useful and to make him feel useful.

(If you do find the magic pill for getting all children to do all chores at all times, without complaining, please let me know!)

Honestly, this section deserves more, but as this is something I feel that I am still growing and learning in at a much more rapid rate than the other areas, I'd rather let other writers speak on the topic :-).

What are "extras" for the kindergarten years? 

Crafts. Crafts are extra.

I am a semi-crafty lady, but I do not consider myself to be a crafty mom. If my 8yo was my only child, we would do crafts all day, every day. Every history unit would be one big craft fest. We would celebrate every holiday by making oodles of handmade decorations.

But with four children, not all of whom like CraftsMoreCrafts, and one of whom is a very precocious 2yo, I find the more I focus on the activities/worksheets/crafts accompanying school, the less reading we do. And we all really love reading! The more "enrichment" crafts we do, the less time we spend outside. And I'd rather them run around in the leaves and swing for an hour than put together a lapbook about autumn that required way more effort for me than for them. For the average child, they will learn more by getting dirty or by being read to. This does not mean crafts or lapbooks are bad, but that they are not essential and that for many children or families, too many can and will detract from the "better."

If you like crafts, have the time, have a child inclined to it, go for it! Crafts can be wonderful memory-builders and can help with fine-motor skills. But don't guilt yourself if you don't do "enough" of them, and don't be frustrated if your 5yo isn't as enthusiastic about that perfect craft project as you are. (I had one of those children!)

Classes outside the home. Definitely extra.

Do you know your child does not need to know how to "do school" in a classroom environment at the age of 5? Really! Yes, learning to sit still, being polite in turn taking, and respecting teacher authority can be enhanced in the classroom setting. But our forefathers did a much better job instilling these traits in their progeny with a lot less class time and a much more "delayed" approach to formal education. So please don't call classes a necessary or even the best way to foster these :-). Family devotions and daily family life can accomplish the same goals.

"Wrong" at this age? No! But not required, and often not even useful!

Apps, or other electronic means of "education." 

No, I'm not going to call you a bad parent if your child uses an iPad. Or watches TV shows. Each of my kids has enjoyed a limited use of the free version of Starfall for fun letter play, at age 4 or 5ish. We love Octonauts, and my kids have actually learned a lot from the show. They've also watched a fair bit of Wild Kratts and a few other "educational" options over the years. I also find, though, that the less screen time my kids get (even the educational kind), the better they attend to family life, participate in chores without complaint, play outside eagerly, and the more they don't ask for MORE screen time. (This is especially true of one of my children.) Screen time for a young kid isn't evil, but it's rarely the best option.

As parents, we cannot be all things to all people at all times. We have limited time, limited emotional energy, and limited hands to hold everyone. I get that! (I've been through chronic illness myself while homeschooling a chronically ill child. I REALLY get that.) You do not have to be Super Mom. Use tools, tricks, and toys well, and use them sparingly. They really are more effective that way :-).

Why Kindergarten Really Does Look Different for a First Child (And That's Okay) 

If you are homeschooling a first child through kindergarten (or preschool, or first grade, or anything!), you are experiencing a first. A first time YOU are responsible for teaching the material. A first time you are gauging your child's strengths, weaknesses. A first time you have to decide which of many people/blogs/pinterest boards are "right."

(Good luck! You can't win this battle, Mom! Your standard and your judge is your Lord, not the neighbor, the Super Blogger Mom, your mother-in-law, your mother, or the woman at church or the store or play group who wants to live vicariously through you.)

This is the first time as an educator that you have to decide if your child's disobedience is solely his own fault (We call this "sin nature."), or if you have encouraged his disobedience (We call this "exasperating your child.") by expecting too much, too soon. When you school your second child or any successive child, that child will be different from your first, and you will STILL have to make those calls (and you will still make mistakes!), but it won't be the same as figuring it out the first time. Trust me.

So give yourself grace. Grace to make mistakes. Grace to experiment, to try, to fail, to change your plans if you realize this was NOT the best option for your child.

But about changing plans. . .
It's good to change plans when we realize your plans are a bad idea.

But sometimes the plan isn't the problem; you just need to give it more time.

I met a homeschool mom a few years ago who was on her FOURTH reading curriculum with her five-year-old daughter. Nothing "worked" for her - the mom, not the child. Yes, there are bad reading curricula out there. But she freely admitted to me that the bigger problem was her lack of consistency. The curriculum wasn't providing a magic genie to teach her daughter to read, bottomline.

Don't be afraid to adjust your timetable expectations, not your curriculum. Don't be afraid to admit your attitude might be the larger problem, or that HOW you do the curriculum is more important than WHAT curriculum you use. Does your child need the consistency of doing a very small bit of schoolwork every single day, or he won't do it at all? (I had one of those!) Does your child need to only look at "schoolwork" 2 days a week? If your kindergarten curriculum is so intense that for an average child, you can't "get through it" in a year by only "schooling" for 2 short days a week, I would suggest your kindergarten curriculum is too much.

Do throw out your curriculum if it's not working for you! But give it time to prove itself, and don't cycle through curriculum willy-nilly. This can be just as damaging to a good education, if not more so, than a bad curriculum. A curriculum is a tool, but a good teacher can make up for a bad curriculum. Confusing a poor child by constantly changing direction, focus, philosophy, and books can be very unsettling.

A Word About the Trickle-Down Effect 

So back to why kindergarten looks different for a first child.

It's because you don't have the trickle-down effect! After I explain the trickle-down effect, I will explain why understanding what you DON'T have (the trickle-down effect) as a first-time kindergartener-schooler does change how you might school different from that sage wise mom of 6 who informs you that HER children never "need" special kindergarten crafts or math at age 5, and how she waits until they are age ____ (fill in the blank) to start phonics.

The trickle-down effect means that my 5yo Martin doesn't have a science curriculum for kindergarten this year. Many of the books his 8yo sister is reading (or having read to her) for botany this year are also read to him, and he loves it! The trickle-down effect means that his 8yo sister reads him many of her simpler history books. It means he wants to trace our geography maps because everyone else does!

The trickle-down effect means Martin learned to count to 100 simply by listening to siblings.  It means that when his sister told him (a bit condescendingly) a few weeks ago that "he'll get to fractions when he's older," he whipped out a pencil and paper and drew me a circle divided in two, and explained to me that he drew "two tooths." (Read it out loud.) Then he proceeded to write several more fractions in standard numerator/denominator form, and told me (correctly) what they were.

It means he decided this year that he is "learning Latin" because his older siblings are learning it. He enthusiastically participates in Latin chants and oral quizzes, which involve no-pressure for him, but will make the language somewhat familiar to him when he studies it formally in 3 years. The trickle-down effect also means that when he learns a new Bible memory verse or catechism question, he's already heard it many times from siblings, even if he hadn't memorized it himself yet!

Martin is my wonderful but decidedly "most average of my children" child. I don't give you all the trickle-down-effect anecdotes for him to make you think you're missing out or to brag on his imagined genius, but to help you see what a very average child picks up simply by having older siblings in the home!

The trickle-down effect means my second child taught herself her letters and most of the sounds by spying on my time with her older brother, and then she proceeded a few years later to teach her younger brother the letters. It means I never taught my third child "formally" how to identify shapes or colors. It just happened.

I believe strongly in not allowing a third child to be lost in the parent's effort to always "aim for the older kids" in read-alouds, to the point of leaving the youngest behind. This is why Martin and I read so many wonderful picture books together, and why there are certain chapter books that my husband hasn't read to the kids during his evening reads, as there are plenty of other wonderful chapter book options that the three olders can all enjoy.

BUT, my 5yo still gets exposure to a lot of really wonderful, complex chapter books that he wouldn't be exposed to, if he wasn't #3 child. He enthusiastically listens to our audio book rotation (currently reading through 100 Cupboards on audio, on car rides) and great history read-alouds (he was fascinated by Story of the World). He is constantly the victim (hehe) of his older siblings eagerly wanting to expose him to their new favorite books, by offering to read to him.

Basically, a lot of "extra" benefits, he gets simply by living in a house with a homeschooled 8yo and 10yo. You can't recreate this if your kindergartener is your only!

And that's okay.

You may choose to do more crafts or activities or games with your first child. If you love to do this, relish it! You may have time with future children, and you may not. Enjoy this time, with this little person. When your next child comes along, relish what his kindergarten years will look like, even if it doesn't look the same. If you find yourself "doing less" as far as the "extras," remind yourself of all the wonderful trickle-down effect and sibling camaraderie (and squabbles, ahem) he's getting instead :-).

Sometimes when an older mom who has done kindergarten teaching several times tells a new mom to take it easy, it's because she's right. Spot-on. Kindergarten does not have to be rocket science! It can be very low-key and should be, in fact. But sometimes, I'm convinced that her kindergarten children are learning far more and are way more ready for 1st grade than she realizes, simply because they are not first children.

If you have a gifted child.

Your friend who has decided to redshirt her kindergartener may have made the right choice for her child. But you don't have to give in to her pressure on you to do the same for your child, especially if you suspect your child is gifted. Putting a truly gifted child delayed a year might do more damage than help; it could make your child labeled ADHD, defiant, or just plain ornery. He might lose his love of learning, or never develop it. So do what you feel (after thought, prayer, and observation) is right for your child, not what your friend is telling you to do. (The same could be said for the opposite, of advancing a child rapidly, without reason.)

Not every child that a parent thinks is "gifted" really is. This is okay! Most kindergarteners are bright, love to learn letters, etc. You are their best cheerleader! Enjoy their milestones!

But if you think giftedness is a possibility, look for truly out-of-the-ordinary traits over multiple years, that indicate to you that your child might need education fostered in a more individual or accelerated way, allowing him to move at a different pace than his peers. Don't draw attention to him, either to himself or others (except a trusted few, who could mentor you on this path), and don't unnecessarily label him a grade ahead, simply because NOW he's tracking ahead. This can bite later, if he merely is a quick bloomer or blooms temporarily under pressure, but will level out to average over the years (and this is fine!). Remember that your child is still your child, not a trophy.

You can always graduate a child early if he gets through the coursework, but this can be decided YEARS from now! It's a lot emotionally harder to move a child "back" to his chronological grade later on, if you realize that you pushed too much, too early. If your child flies through phonics and kindergarten math at age 4, it does NOT mean he needs a complete 1st grade course load the following year!

Many gifted children have asynchronous development, which means they excel in certain areas, but are "average" or even behind in other areas. My super-early reader who had a high vocabulary and rapidly progressed through math BUT was "behind" in handwriting and emotional development is a perfect example of this! He's highly gifted, but his schooling has taken a lot of careful thought.

For example, he made it through phonics and kindergarten math prior to his 5th birthday. But I waited a year to start an English or history or science curriculum (until he was age 6), and I waited until he was fully 7 years old to start formal spelling. (I recognize that some educational philosophies don't even do English and spelling in elementary, but I'm speaking as someone who does do it, but didn't "push" into it just because he had finished kindergarten material.) He continued to progress in math and is to this day advanced in this area and is working well "above grade level," but we did most of it verbally for a few more years. We also did a lot of his math while jumping on a trampoline or racing around the house.

Just because he could read a 200-page book from a young age doesn't mean I required that, and certainly didn't mean I required book reports, detailed verbal analysis, or anything else that a middle or high school class that assigned the same book might require. He just read it, and sometimes we talked about it. A gifted child needs permission to act their age. Not act childishly, but act their age.

Now, this might seem like a weird way to end a post on kindergarten goals, but. . . 

I have an idea. 

Instead of focusing on having children "kindergarten-ready" in the preschool years, so they enter kindergarten "on track" (whatever that means?), what if the early years of 3-6 were spent towards the goal of having a child "second-grade-ready" by the time they were 7-8 years old?

This gives so much breathing room for a child being a child and spending a lot of time in the great outdoors, for a "second-grade-ready" list to be finished at quite a varying rate, depending on the development of the individual child. It gives flexibility for children who don't develop a pencil grasp early, for children who struggle with phonics, for children who need extra focus on discipline and self-control.

The purpose of this goal is not for a parent to slack and give no direction in education or self-discipline in the early years, but to focus on the child's rate of need and development, not rushing towards a goal that is too early for some. I think it could save a lot of headaches and a lot of worry, and allow children to thrive, if done well.

Wednesday, October 03, 2018

Elementary Science in Keisterland, Through the Years


My kids and I love science! We devour books on nature, plants and animals. We read about weather, the water cycle, astronomy, you name it. We've made body posters, etc. It's a fun topic that we are continually exploring and enjoying.

But what's my "game plan" for science? What is the nitty gritty of how I plan and implement curriculum for science? This year I have a kindergartener, 3rd grader, and 5th grader, and a healthy dose of distraction in the form of a 2yo. You can subtract each age by one and figure out where we were last year, and the year before, etc. Each year changes and I'm all about realism and doing what works for us.

But first, my philosophy. I think science is a huge bonus and exciting adventure for elementary kids. I say "bonus" because I don't technically think a science text is necessary in the elementary years. We often use one, but I don't see it as necessary. I don't see the elementary years as a checklist for studying "x" number of scientific subjects. I mean, I have a mental list of types of things I have tried to cover, but I really and truly believe that it's not a big deal if you haven't studied the human body or astronomy by 6th grade. I just don't.

I want my kids to love science. I think a really important aspect of science is just being outside. Notice plant patterns, animals you see, talk about weather. Nothing fancy. Go for hikes, have a wildflower search. Let them throw rocks into a pond, hopefully not at each other. Rake leaves and talk about why leaves change color and fall. Help them to NOTICE. If an adult is interested in nature and observing the outdoors, a child will follow lead. I am reading an absolutely fabulous book right now called "The Last Child in the Woods." PLEASE READ IT. It is so good!

In fact, the only homeschool group we are a part of is a nature group that just goes to local nature parks and lets the kids roam around and make dirt mounds and collect sticks and play in creeks. Seriously, no formal curriculum. Kids just enjoying catching frogs. Sometimes a parent gives a little "talk" at the end about a certain topic, but the format is short and super informal. The goal is time in nature, in community. Seriously, that's our only homeschool group.

So that's my philosophy in elementary, for science: wonderment, observation, exposure to nature, perusing topics. Oh, and good books. We love good books on science.

We have used a lot of the Apologia elementary series for science. I really just love them. They are so approachable, conversational, appropriate in level, and have always sparked interest in my kids. They are not dry and boring. I love that they "sit" on one area (plants, for example, or all flying creatures) for an entire year, so you really get a chance to think about a whole topic for a while. No racing around from "magnetism" to "skeletal system" to "trees" in the course of three chapters. That gives me whiplash.

We started with Botany when Hans was in kindergarten or first grade, I think? We read the entire text. and did almost all the experiments. I love, love how simple and approachable the plant activities are. We dug up roots, collected and classified leaves, took rubbings of leaves and bark. It was FUN. We started an extremely-amateur nature journal.

Then we read Flying Creatures in its entirety and kept a bird poster. We took a lot of neighborhood walks and learned to NOTICE the birds around us. I learned so much and so did they! Every bird we correctly classified, I found a realistic coloring page online and Hans and Gretchen colored, cut out, labeled, and pasted to our poster. We still talk about the birds we observed. Science fell apart towards the end of the year (health and house woes!), and although we did finish the book and enjoyed all the insect reading, I'm pretty sure zero hands-on projects happened. Ha! Gretchen was only K age, so she was not required to participate in any of this, but she usually wanted to.

For our Swimming Creatures year, I'll be really honest. Our lives were a mess. Rampant health issues, and recently moving to a new state. . WE BOUGHT THE AUDIO. Best option ever. It's the only year I've really wanted the audio, and it helped us through. Oh, also, we watched a LOT of Octonauts. For reals, that turned my now-5yo into a sea creature lover, continuing to this day. I bought the Swimming Creatures science experiment kit, in the hopes that we'd do the experiments, and in predictable fashion, we got through maybe 1/3 of the options. It was just NOT a great year for extras. Keepin' it real!

Last year was supposed to be astronomy, and technically it was. I bought the AIG text "Our Universe," and Hans read it on his own in a week. I honestly don't know how much he read, but he loved it. And I bought a ton of Usborne books about the solar system, space, astronomy, etc. and sprinkled them on the coffee table and let the kids have at it. That was our "formal" science. It was a BAD year for my health (Lyme and EBV), and my oldest was still recovering from Lyme and PANDAS. Remember my philosophy about science being a bonus? YES. The kids savored the Usborne books and read them several times on their own, but I never formally assigned them. Oh, and we FINALLY made it to a local stargazing event (ONE, not the original 3+ that I was hoping for), in late winter.

But you know what we did during that year? We read a TON of science and nature books from the library. Unscheduled, not required, not on a specific topic (since our specific goal that year was astronomy and we'd already covered it), but we loved it. Anytime someone on a blog or FB mentioned liking a given book, I checked if our library had it and put it on reserve. I sprinkled the books on the coffee table, and I read some out loud, as time permitted. The older kids read many to Martin or to themselves.

And we joined our weekly nature group, which gave us lots more informal opportunities to talk about nature and observe things. I got several books from the library that filled in minor "gaps" (remember, it's all bonus, but mental goals are helpful!) that Apologia really doesn't cover, such as the water cycle and weather. We also have taken advantage of the city's free-admission science museum many times. We love the displays and the hands-on room!

(Also in the last 5 years, we've done a mini human anatomy study twice, where we read a human body encyclopedia (I think it was a DK book) and made a human body poster and read about each of the 10 body systems. Fun!)

So that's a bit of glimpse into our science through the years. So what's this year?

Well, my oldest was poised to take a look at some basic chemistry and physics concepts, and I knew he'd love the Apologia elementary-level Chemistry and Physics book. But in flipping through it, I knew that to truly enjoy it and get a lot out of it, this was not going to be a sprinkle-on-the-coffee-table year for science with him. So he and I are slowly picking our way through that book and really enjoying it! My goal is to do some of the experiments, if he reminds me (I love that clause with an older child! Then it's his responsibility), and if we have the supplies or they can be bought cheap.

But in looking at the C&P book, I really didn't think Gretchen would get as much out of it. She's smart as a whip and I could have assigned her the same, but I knew she'd bloom more by cycling back to studying botany (which we'd read informally a lot about the last few years, but hadn't actually focused on them). Why push it? So instead, we are using the Apologia Botany as our guide, but she's welcome to join us for Hans' science. What this means is that she often wants to "pop in" while we're reading, but doesn't have the pressure. And since this girl is all about plants and FLOWERS, this year is a fun year for her!

And note I said the Apologia Botany book is our "guide." It's not actually our main text. I'm using the chapter titles and topics to search for books on the topics. Via friend recommendations and handy internet searches, there are just so many wonderful books out there, and I'm all about library reservations. We are using some of the activities in the text and reading some aspects of the text, but using alternate books for about 90% of our readings. These readings are sometimes together, and sometimes Gretchen reads to herself and sometimes to Martin (age 5). Martin's participation is optional but encouraged.

Why am I not reading through the Botany book cover-to-cover? A number of reasons:

- Having already gone through it myself, I have a much better idea of great options to cover. Reading it through once trained me as a teacher as much as it informed Hans as a student. Now I have a great idea what to cover!
- I am realistic, and knew that I would not get through reading two science books (the botany AND the chemistry/physics) cover-to-cover in a school year without hating it or making the kids hate it. I didn't want to be stressed, as I knew that would transfer to the kids.
- Gretchen is a very proficient reader, but handing her a wordy (even though conversational and approachable) text to read herself wouldn't work as well as handing her a book on flowers to read herself. She is probably reading about 1/2 of the books by herself or to Martin. But I try to listen to her desires to read with me, and any of the more involved books we read, we read together. Just because she CAN read a book herself, doesn't mean I require it at the age of 7 (she is 8 next week). (We have the same philosophy at this stage with her history reads.)
- It's just hard to beat the really gorgeous books I've found for botany. I have a much better idea of where to look and what to look for, for gorgeous and engaging science books than I did a few years ago. And I love using them!

So there you go: what we've done, the better years, the surviving years, the general philosophy, and the changing process of kids getting older and branching into two different fields of study in a year. Hope this is helpful to anyone else trying to figure out the process or needs some grace and space to relax and find your own way. You've got this.

Of Kavanaugh, political angst, and training our littles.

I have 2 girls who I hope never experience sexual assault. I pray that they are surrounded throughout their lives with real men who will value them for their person, not their body. And I pray they will never falsely smear another person's name through the mud for political gain or revenge.
I also have 2 boys who I hope will never be rightly or falsely charged with assaulting someone else. I pray they will be wise with their actions and thoughts, and that they will value women and not view them as sex objects. I pray they will never have their lives ripped apart because of their own stupid actions or because of the manipulations of a liar.
It's hard to be a mom in 2018. And my oldest is only 10 years old. We haven't hit puberty yet, and I am totally not interested in discussing Kavanaugh with my kids. It's not because I don't care, it's not because I think they would never be in a similar situation (as either Kavanaugh or his accusers, and either as guilty or innocent). It's because instruction needs to be age-appropriate.
Yelling in a tv or laptop screen that someone is a liar or that such-and-such political party is corrupt or that all of this is for political gain or that we should ignore due process of law and accept a sketchy testimony. . . none of that teaches someone under 11 years old a whole lot except that Mommy is angry (and believe me, I'm angry about a lot of aspects of our current political system) and jumps to conclusions. So I don't.
But what CAN we do? What can young moms do for our kids and for future generations, when we have nastiness in the world? What can we teach our kids today, tomorrow, and the next day, to help prevent another Kavanaugh disaster?
- Teach them to respect others. Teach them proper touch and don't shame them if they respond strongly to someone touching them in a way that makes them feel uncomfortable. Teach them boundaries of touch, modesty, and listening to the feelings of others.
- Read "The Boy Who Cried Wolf." Talk about the importance of telling the truth, what a handful of lies can do to your believability, and model truthfulness to them. Do you stretch the truth to them? They will learn to stretch the truth to you and others.
- Talk about being falsely accused and what that feels like. Role play with them and you be the accused. Respond in various ways, either humbly, defensively, pathetically, angrily. Ask them which responses make your testimony of innocence look more believable.
- Talk about what it feels like when you are telling the truth and you aren't believed. How does that make you feel?
- Teach them not to name call. Humans are created in the image of God. Treat them like it. Treat them like it even if they are acting like trash. Challenge them, engage them, accuse them through proper channels. But don't be passive aggressive, don't shut down communication prematurely.
- Teach them the dangers of narcissism. Teach them they are not always right. Teach them to view a situation through another person's eyes. Are they defending what they did (or didn't do) to a sibling? Ask them if they would feel the same if they were in their sibling's place.
- Teach them to address the issue, not their own anger. And if you ask them a direct question about a situation, teach them that you expect a direct answer, not a rabbit trail. You are their first courtroom.
- Teach them to choose friends wisely. I'm talking here about close friends that you hang out with a lot. Open a conversation about peer pressure and "what would you do?" scenarios if others are doing things they know are wrong. Give examples at their level of times you made the right or wrong choice. Be honest with them.
- Teach them not to hold grudges. Don't judge a person because of his past. Teach them forgiveness. Model it. Don't bring up their past offenses to them constantly. Be wise in discerning someone else's character, but don't assume that the person they once were is the person they now are.
- Teach them that mumbling "I'm sorry" in a surly tone isn't repentance. Explain to them the difference between a lame apology or an excuse for their actions, v. genuine repentance. If your words don't match your actions, it shows.
- Teach them that this world is not their home. Teach them to pray for our Lord to come quickly. And for us to be faithful workers in His kingdom until that day.
- Teach them that there is forgiveness in Christ. Always. That means that there is forgiveness every time you as a parent fail to model all of these bullet points to your children. Every time you don't respond in forgiveness. Every time you don't model a cool, calm, and collected manner of assessing a situation. Every time you aren't completely honest with your kids. You will fail, I will fail. Let them see our humility, our picking ourselves up and practicing what we preach. Let them hear our reminders to them and us that our model is Christ, not any mere human.
Don't give up. Don't cop out. Don't check out. Don't flee. Stay and engage and train our future. But pray for the day when the glory of the Lord will fill this earth and there will be no more political posturing or political parties. Amen to that.

Monday, March 13, 2017

What a cochlear implant is NOT, what it IS, WHY we chose to implant our daughter, and our expectations for Heidi


As mentioned previously, our youngest daughter, Heidi, was born deaf. She is almost 15 months old, and received bilateral cochlear implants last week. I first heard of cochlear implants (CI's) a few years ago, but really didn't understand what they were, how they were used, or what they can or cannot accomplish until recently. And even now, I only have a rudimentary knowledge as to the range of outcomes for CI's and some of the pros and cons. We're still novices at this!

But given how little I used to know about CI's and given that I receive many many questions from friends and family that reflect a similar basic gap in understanding, I thought I'd write out some info that can hopefully clear up many of the questions people have regarding Heidi. I don't mind questions and always appreciate people caring enough about Heidi's journey to ask questions. . . even if they are very basic questions or questions based on a misunderstanding. That's okay! And for my friends-and-also-professionals who read this, feel free to make any corrections on my explanations :-D.

First of all, what a cochlear implant is NOT. This honestly is a really important thing to understand. CI's are absolutely NOT a cure for deafness. When I first heard of cochlear implant surgery (we had a deaf neighbor when we lived in Texas, who had CI surgery around age 6) it was explained to me as a way to correct deafness and let someone hear. Um, no. No, no, no. This is not like repairing a torn ligament or even like something such as corrective eye surgery. Cochlear implant surgery does not fix deafness. And I'm not mincing words here, or trying to hold onto a label of "deafness" that I somehow don't want to let go.

So what IS a cochlear implant? Basically, CI surgery implants a device into a person's cochlea (in the inner ear) that allows the auditory nerve to be stimulated through electronic means, to bypass the usual sound pathway of ear canal, eardrum, middle ear bones, etc. For whatever reason, one of the main causes of deafness (by no means the only cause) is insufficient hair cells in the cochlea. These hair cells are extremely crucial to hearing and the stimulation of them through the usual means are exactly HOW a person hears. Without these hair cells (or other possible reasons why hearing is absent), sometimes a CI can be used to stimulate the cochlea in a mimicry way.

What was actually inserted into Heidi's head last week was two sets (one for each side) of electrode arrays that were slid into her cochleas and naturally coil up into the snail shell shape of a cochlea. Different pitches of sound in normal hearing stimulate different areas of this snail shell shape (and transmit this info to the auditory nerve, and in turn, the brain). In a similar way, with the technology of a CI, sound transmitted through an external microphone and processor then sends a signal to trigger electrodes along the inserted electrode array, which in turn stimulate the area of the cochlea corresponding to that sound.

In theory. Actually, it doesn't work out so perfectly in actuality. The sounds perceived by a CI recipient APPROXIMATE actual sounds, but can be "off" in pitch by quite a bit, which matters some in learning to listen and/or speak, and even more in learning to listen to music, as pitch is more important in musical settings. A CI recipient goes through gradual therapy over several months, that introduces the brain to more and more of a range of sounds, as the brain accustoms to sound and perception of sound. And even after initial auditory-verbal therapy, most CI recipients will need additional speech therapy to groom their speech.

Some CI recipients never develop enough sound discrimination to develop speech, while others are indistinguishable in speech from a "hearing" person. Some CI candidates are very accustomed to sound and speech, and prefer using sound v. choosing silence and signing. Other CI candidates find their strength in sign language, visual perception and expression, and other non-auditory methods of exploring, communicating with, and viewing the world, and either benefit from a CI in more general ways (awareness of environmental noises, but not speech) or don't benefit from CI's at all. More on the varied "success" of CI's later. . .

But back to what a CI is not. Remember that I said CI surgery is not a cure for deafness? One of the very real reasons it is not is because a CI does absolutely nothing unless the outer processor is attached (with working batteries). If the outer processor is not being worn, no electrodes are stimulating the cochlea, the auditory nerve is not being stimulated, and no hearing is taking place. In other words, the person is still deaf. Cochlear implants are battery operated devices that can be turned on and off at will.

Post-surgery, one of the most common questions I've gotten is if we've noticed Heidi responding to sound yet. We haven't yet, for the very simple reason that she hasn't even been given her outer processor yet. In order to not associate the new experience of sound with potential pain, the surgery site has to fully heal before she's given her initial sound stimulation in a few weeks. In addition to the electrode array, also implanted directly under her skin is a magnet that will be used to attach her external processor in place when she's using her CI's to access sound.

Even when she's "turned on" at the end of March, her processors are programmed very low, to only stimulate a select range of sounds. As the months progress, the idea is to slowly program her to receive more and more sound input, as she becomes accustomed to sound and as her brain learns to process sound. Remember, as far as we can tell, she has probably never heard anything, so this is all new stuff for her brain! I've met one mom with a deaf daughter who was implanted about a decade ago, and the mom told me that her daughter didn't even respond to sound at the initial stimulation, because the program was turned so low initially. So it'll be interesting to see if Heidi even visibly "notices" her initial program, or if that'll wait until future programs that add more to the spectrum.

Okay, so here's the million dollar question and the most controversial: why did we choose to implant Heidi? For many people we have met, the assumption was that OF COURSE we'd implant her, because why wouldn't we want to use this amazing technology, and for other people we've met, they've been very leary of the use of cochlear implants and counseled us against or counseled us to wait and let Heidi decide. Why or why not?

Well, I'll start off with saying I totally "get" why someone would choose either path. We wrestled with a lot of pros and cons, and while we felt confident in the end with wanting to explore cochlear implants for Heidi, we also understand the concerns with CI's and why others might choose other paths. Here is what it boiled down to for us:

On the con side, it really really gave us pause to consider allowing our child to go "under the knife" for a non-life-threatening reason. We didn't take this lightly. We know every surgical procedure has risks, and drilling into the skull (to be quite frank) certainly has some. So does having a permanently-implanted device in your body. We're okay with Heidi just the way she is. She doesn't NEED hearing, she can have a full life without it, and we believe that she could be just as content in her deafness as we are with it. Not just "okay" with deafness, but thrive with deafness.

Hearing loss is just that: a loss of hearing. Heidi's brain is fully functioning, she is in excellent health, and is poised to take on life to the fullest. As long as we pack language into her, she's fine. And we truly believe that. This is exactly why we've poured so much of our time and energy into sign language this past year, and why we will continue to make sign language part of our family culture and part of our means of communicating with Heidi.

The two major objections to CI's, especially to those in the Deaf community, as far as I can tell, revolve around concern with (1) neglect of sign language in order to focus on listening and speech and (2) perception of deafness as a "disability" that needs to be fixed.

As I already said, we don't plan to neglect sign language, as we simply don't know what Heidi's success with a cochlear implant will be. If a child is not given a full language by age 5, this language deprivation can have permanent repercussions on their mental and cognitive function, even if they're given language later. Because we don't know NOW if Heidi will have full access to language through a cochlear implant EVENTUALLY, we don't want to wait and wait and then find out after she's already language-deprived that she needed sign language and that we should have been learning it sooner.

To address the more controversial topic of deafness as a disability, one must understand that a culturally Deaf person not only is fine with their Deafness, but is happy they're Deaf, and offended by terms such as "hearing disabled." This is why I use the term deaf to describe Heidi, because it simply isn't an offensive term. It's a perfectly acceptable label. A person who is culturally Deaf doesn't need or want pity, and is quite happy in a soundless world. For hearing parents to have the chutzpah to "fix" their deaf child without consulting the child is potentially offensive to many who consider themselves "capital D" culturally Deaf.

From the beginning of our journey with Heidi's deafness, I've sought to be very sensitive to the Deaf community, Deaf beliefs, and a Deaf perspective on what Heidi needs, listening to the voices of the Deaf community as well as medical professionals. I think both worlds have much to offer us, as hearing parents of a deaf child. I absolutely will not tolerate comments to this post that mock the Deaf community or Deaf beliefs. Period. I find their language beautiful and their love of who they are AS they are (rather than a discontent in who they are not) to be inspiring and comforting.

But that being said, yes, I consider hearing to be the normal way that God created man to communicate, and we believe God's promise in the Bible that He came to make the deaf man hear and the lame man leap for joy. Deafness is not a blessing to us (except in so much that we believe that God redeems everything for Himself and brings good for His people out of all circumstances), it is not something we sought, it is not something we would pray for in another child. But we would welcome another child who is deaf! And we wouldn't choose to prevent more biological children if we discovered Heidi's deafness is genetic. Our deaf child is a blessing! However we also do not have an objection to adding sound to our deaf child's world, if we think it could give her advantages.

And to address a side issue, why did we choose to implant Heidi NOW, v. waiting until she's older and letting her choose that herself? The biggest recommendation I've heard from the Deaf community is not to NEVER implant Heidi, but instead to wait until she's a bit older (anywhere from elementary age or older) and let HER decide if she wants to experience sound. This is her world, her body, and her experience. Let her decide.

And we considered that. But ultimately it boiled down to, for us, a realization that either way - whether we chose to implant her now or waited and let her decide - we already were deciding a major decision for her. We had to choose whether or not to give her that chance for sound access during her most crucial period of language development. She doesn't NEED that sound access, to be clear, but we did have to make the choice either way, to give it or to decline the option.

Getting a cochlear implant at age 7 or age 10 or adulthood - especially for someone like Heidi who is prelingually deaf - is simply NOT the same experience as for someone who is a baby or toddler. There are crucial developmental windows for developing speech that would be missed. Yes, a CI recipient who receives one later can often still get some use out of a CI, but not in the same way that an earlier recipient would. The longer the human brain does not have access to sound, the more the brain rewires itself (how cool is that?) and is "taken over" by the other senses, to compensate. If we waited until Heidi was older and let her decide, she would not have the option to go back and recapture that crucial developmental window for speech and language.

We do NOT believe that a family who doesn't choose early implantation is "depriving" their deaf child of sound or speech. Absolutely not. They are simply choosing a different emphasis and a different option for their child. But we also do not believe that by choosing implantation for Heidi, we are "depriving" her of her deafness. Our intentions, rather, are to give her the fullest opportunity to experience both the hearing and deaf worlds. In order to truly experience the closest that she can to the hearing world, she can best do that by early access to sound stimulation. Should she choose at an older age to "turn off" sound, she can simply stop wearing her outer processor. We would totally support that decision at an appropriate age. Yet another reason to have a sign language base of communication!

We live in a hearing world, and we live in an English-speaking world. And like most deaf children, Heidi was born into a hearing family. If possible, and according to Heidi's abilities, we feel that it will benefit Heidi over time to have tools that allow her to access both the hearing/spoken aspect of our family culture and especially (since the outside world cannot adapt in the same way our family can) to access spoken language and sound in the outside world.

Having access to sound, even electronic stimulated sound - and potentially having access to speech -might allow Heidi to be a much more independent communicator than if her main method of communication was sign language. This in no way is disparaging the use of sign language, either as A means of communication or the ONLY means of communication for her. This is simply recognizing that while living, communicating, and working in modern-day America, not having need of a sign language interpreter to go about daily business can be a huge asset to a deaf individual.

If Heidi was born into a fluently-signing deaf family, this would be completely different. Her language access would be complete and accessible from day one, and her family culture and her built-in close community of friends would already have her language and her culture. (Talking through walls and talking while doing eye-intensive tasks is a major part of our family habits! That's been really difficult to slowly adapt! We are a "hearing culture" family, for sure!)

But Heidi wasn't born into a fluent signing family. And her family, while trying to learn sign, will not be fluent anytime soon! If we choose a signing-only environment for Heidi, realistically she will have limited communication with most of our acquaintances, friends, and family. Yes, we plan to seek out deaf friends in the Deaf community, but we also have a very large foot in the hearing world. We and she don't NEED her to be part of our hearing world, but we'd like her to have as many ways as possible to feel that she belongs in our family and our world in every way. This means developing sign language so that we can communicate with her effectively, but it also means considering ways that we can include her in our inevitable hearing activities, as her ability allows.

There are SO many factors that affect the "success" of a CI, including if a person is deafened pre- or post-lingually, if they have multiple-challenges rather than "just deafness," if they receive adequate follow-up therapy, if they get appropriate language input, if their auditory nerve is fully-functioning, etc. And honestly, there are just a lot of mysteries and questions in medical research as to how to best predict the success of a cochlear implant, for the purpose of accessing sound and developing speech. It might work, it might not.

Our general expectation for Heidi is that she will soar. In her time, in her way. We expect LANGUAGE for her, not because language is automatic, but because it is so essential. We don't know what else to expect, and we're not sure what form that language will take - spoken, signed, written. . . some combination?

Honestly, this is really new ground for us. With our other 3 kids, they became extremely fluent talkers at a young age with ginormous vocabularies simply because their mother never shuts up, tele-commentates EVERYTHING to her babies, and because they were blessed with no communication barriers. With Heidi, language will take a lot more purposeful input than just her mother constantly talking. Factors like background noise, effectiveness of her CI's, therapy, how quickly her family learns sign language and how faithfully they sign with her and around her (it has to be in her field of vision!). . . so much more at play and so much more one-on-one attention needed!

We honestly don't know what to expect as far as what communication mode will work best for her, both short-term and long-term. We've been told by well-meaning people that she will definitely prefer sign language over sound and speech, and that might be what happens. We're okay with that! We've also been told by equally-well-meaning people that she will likely prefer sound and speech, because for most children implanted at her age, it comes easier for them than sign language. That might be true. We're okay with that!

We do not expect that she will be a fluent English speaker, though we are poised for that possibility and it is in the realm of realistic results. We also do not expect she will choose sign language as her primary means of communication, but we are okay if she does, and are working towards greater sign language fluency. We expect God's grace in the craziness and His direction each step of the way. We expect we'll make a lot of mistakes, learn a lot, pray a lot. We expect our whole family will continue to learn a lot and grow a lot through this whole process. And our prayer is that Heidi will thrive and learn to effectively communicate with us, with others, and with her Creator. That's quite enough for us. Anything else is icing on the cake.